There is a certain joy in simplicity. With the abundance of conveniences and material things available today, it’s easy to forget the peace and contentment that comes with keeping things simple. We’re so easily bombarded with more….more commitments, more opportunities, more things and more money. Before we know it, life gets complicated and some of our joy gets buried. I’ve just had an experience that reminded me of the joy in simplicity and helped me see the good in having less.
Experiencing Less
We are just ending an unprecedented time in American history. We, like most of the country, found ourselves in a quarantine and shelter-in-place order. For the last two months, a pandemic has forced us to do almost everything from home. We’ve had no schedule, we’ve had nowhere to go and we’ve learned to get by with less. What we’ve experienced, in my household anyway, is a forced time of simplicity.
At the beginning of this time at home I was fearful and worried. I was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to get the things I needed. I worried that we would miss out on significant things and that I would be bored. Feelings of anxiety over what was being taken away filled my mind. I think these feelings were a pretty natural and common response.
However, as time went on in the stay at home order, we got into a routine. I learned that I could live without many of the conveniences that I previously thought were so essential. I started to enjoy having less on my schedule. The complexities of managing four people going different directions at different times went away. My days were whittled down to essentials like work, meals and time with my family. As a result, our calendars opened up and many of the stresses of our previously busy lives went away.
Did I miss out on some significant things? Yes, I did. Did we all have times of being bored? At first, most definitely. Did new and different stresses, like financial changes and job loss, enter our minds? Unfortunately, they did. I would be lying if I said there were not some negatives to this time.
Yet even with some of these unwanted consequences, I found that a forced time of simplicity brought joy and a new peace to our household. For example, I know that my teenagers enjoyed the break from their busy school and social calendars and they even told me they felt less stress. While my husband and I had some added stresses from our work lives, we enjoyed the added time together as a couple to talk through our feelings and various work issues.
Is Less Really More?
What I really discovered during this forced time of “less” was the ability to add “more”. With less on the schedule, our agenda was open for impromptu family outings and game nights. We had more time to linger at dinner and evenings were open for more conversations and time together. With less commitments on our calendars, we had more time to explore hobbies and work on self-improvement. For example, we all grew more committed to exercise and eating well.
One of the hardest things to adjust to was less money. Our incomes decreased during this shelter-at-home time due to forced job changes. While that is not a welcome thing to anyone I know, it did allow for more of something. Less income meant more gratitude for what we already had and more flexibility to go without or to try something different. Less income meant more priority for what was most important and essential.
Keeping the Joy of Simplicity
Luckily our time of “sheltering in place” and staying at home is over. Life is getting back to normal and our pace of living is steadily increasing. All of the “more” that we went without is slowing coming back like an old familiar friend. We welcome the things we’ve missed, like time with friends, things to do, places to go and structure on our calendars. These things feel familiar and provide a certain comfort that we were living without. However, as we return to a life of more complexity, how do we hold onto the joy we found in the simplicity? The answer involves some critical thought and conscious effort.
I am so happy to have many of the things back that I’ve missed. I’m back to visiting with family, eating out with friends, having people over, going to appointments and driving my kids around with their friends. I’m planning vacations and having to-do lists for my days. Suddenly, I find myself back to checking my calendar each day and planning meals around who will be home and when. The “more” has crept back in.
I wrote in my journal the other day and made a list of the things I liked about this forced time at home and the things I missed. Do you know what? My list of things I liked was 3-4 times longer than the things I missed. When I evaluate the list I see that most of what I liked had to do with simplicity. In my case, the less really did equal more. I want to hold onto those things and make them a part of my “normal”. I want to remember the things that brought me joy during that time and try to incorporate them into my everyday life.
We will all go through times of having less than we desire. In those times of less to do, less money, fewer options and a slower pace, I urge you to look for the good in the simplicity. There is joy to be found that doesn’t always come from having more.
Challenge for the week:
Evaluate your calendar for what is essential. Make sure you reserve sufficient time for these things
Ask yourself what things are just “more” and extra without adding joy to your life. Are these things necessary or can you eliminate them to bring simplicity to your life?
Think of a simpler time in your life, when you had to go with less. Then make a list of what you missed and compare that to what you look forward to having back. The comparison may surprise you!